parents have no disregard to the fact their child is grown.
they don’t give a shit that i have a massive paper due TODAY. THE SAME DAY.
and i didn’t get to finish it because of their bullshit in this house
and now they are asking me to run errands for them?
someone please adopt me……
once this paper is done i am going outside and planning my next GREAT ESCAPE.
awesome. my mouse batteries just died
my laptop is totally overheating
done for the night. so gonna browse the itouch and look for flights.
sigh.
my laptop constantly overheating
my now ex-best friend: i was extremely sad about this at first, but that has turned into anger. we stopped speaking when she got upset that I was going to Holland for the third time.
she is completely selfish; she hates my travel writing thing, the fact that im happy and she can’t be happy for me; its a long story to explain but, misery loves company and whenever i talk to her about my accomplishments she doesn’t listen and just complains about her life but doesn’t do a shit about it.
i can see now im “replaced” with some girl she clubs with now. it hurts. now all of a sudden she’s in nyc EVERY weekend. WTF. How many weekends I asked her to come out to my travel parties that were VIP and FREE OPEN BAR and she bitched how she hates coming to nyc and now shes going out all the time!?!? And going to a vodka bar place when i INVITED HER to the ICELAND VODKA PARTY and she said ew no way i hate vodka…. WHAT THE FUCK
yeah. okay. that has sucked enough of my life.
then as im finishing my readings, i get a request for a family member from Rosa… I don’t know any Rosa’s…
It’s my ex boyfriend’s cousin.
I wanted to cry. I don’t miss him or give a shit. But, the fact that his family is so big or he hasn’t freaking told anyone we’ve been done for 2 years now!??!?!
That memory pains me. Why? Because it reminds me of the family parties I accompanied him to for 5 years. The closeness of the family in my life… how I saw our future together and he led me in that direction when he was already over me or just too pussy to fix it or break it off.
ughhhhhhh you know what
none of that shit matters
im trying to learn the art of letting go
done deal.
that shit shouldn’t bother me. ridiculous. i have enough to worry about
idk ive been so stressed out lately.
so much to do and think about
i need to write this letter
and i cant. because i have to sleep. school tomorrow.
i so need a solo vacation.
summer is over and i have a cold i have 2 books to read, 7 articles to write and a paper due all on monday im finally in a better mood; woke up feeling sicky but semi-accomplished getting work done, realizing its so good to be in school, even practiced some Nederalands taal. and all you can think about is this competition. when its not. i wish you’d just listen. actually listen. some people were just born really lucky to be able to finish school and have opportunities like this while i have to bartend, massage, write, sweat, stress, run around and MAKE IT HAPPEN or else i’ll end up no where and you’d think jealousy kills that i’d be so mad at these people but im not. it only makes me work harder and that much more fulfilling. i need space major space like africa space or outer space gonna get my green tea, vitamin c, and tan on. peace bitches.
going out tomorrow. wait ugh i have work. maybe after work. or before work. or during work. i don’t know. i don’t want to feel anything right now.
uncensored me lives. i forgot about this blog and its funny b/c its the uncensored blog to my uncensored blog. anyway.
what happens when you’re in the best relationship:
he knows your every mood, touch and what you’re thinking.
one look says it all. he knows when you’re sad, troubled, angry or happy.
the sex is so intense; it’s the kind you see in movies where passionate kisses are delectable, every grab, pull and thrust is mind blowing… and it goes on and on and on. hearts racing, sweat dripping, bedsheet pulling, body shaking intense sex that porn can’t even imitate.
you don’t finish each other’s sentences, but even better- you share interests, thoughts, ideologies; life is an adventure and here we are embarking on what is important; the fulfillment of happiness.
you speak to each other and feel overwhelmed with this glowing feeling of fulfillment; the urge of being understood, loved and appreciated. every day together feels like a movie moment; where you’re in the middle of the city, holding hands without a care in the world, looking into each other’s eyes and knowing the feeling is so right. or when you just get in a car together and just jet off to an unknown place that becomes an epic adventure; stories of silly inside jokes that we laugh about till this day.
and the comfort of each other’s presence and respect when things get real. when we realize the reality of the situation and how to take care of each other as human beings. the respect of emotions and feelings and knowing no matter what happens; you are loved.
so tell me this:
what happens when this person that gives you this bombastic feeling..
is not your boyfriend?
:(
im only human… yet i am falling apart at this conundrum i’ve put myself in…
is fucking amazing.
savory and delectable
#justsayin
a #bfd travel blogger comes up to me and says “well, everyone knows you here from ______ (my blog)”
and it made me wonder if people really know who i am
i don’t even run that twitter handle….
i think i need to be in the driver’s seat
even if i don’t know how to drive.
So I’m a little scatterbrained
Usually late
Off balanced
Overly sexual
A hot mess
I’m happy to be me
I’ve come a long way
That no matter what happens
I’m happy w me, myself and I.
:)
